Santa vs Neji
by BlackMorale
Summary: Neji doesn't believe in santa, he says that if you believe in the dead they will rise. So that Christmas night santa visited the hyuuga estate and a disaster occured...


**Santa vs. Neji**

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Naruto and/or its characters. But I own Neji! Mwahaha!!! Seriously no but he's already taken! By me!

A little OOCness!

---The Day before Christmas, Hyuuga Estate---

"I'm going to force Santa to give me those cool black wristbands they show on tv!" Hanabi declared to her friends. They were telling each other what they want from Santa. If they don't receive it, they'll beat the crap out of him even though it wasn't his fault.

"Neji-niisan, what would you like to get from Santa?" Hanabi asked her cousin who was passing by.

"I don't believe in Santa, he's not real. He's just Barney's creator that weirdoes dress up as and goes to houses to deliver presents to children in the middle of the night. If you're lucky enough you could see him making noise in malls. Once I caught my dad placing a present under our Christmas tree when I was four." He said proudly as he left.

"Sorry I'm late!" Naruto screamed as he barged in the Hokage's office. The Rookie Nine, their senseis (including Gai's Baki's team), Shizune and Tsunade all gathered to do something together.

"Geez. People these days don't knock anymore." Tsunade complained.

"That's all of us. Kakashi-sensei would be coming in late again as always." Sasuke said coolly which for me is disgusting.

"Everyone, form a circle and sit down." Tsunade instructed and everyone followed.

"Hey, are we gonna sing happy crappy songs? 'Cause if we are, I'll leave. Karasu needs to get polished." Kankuro stated.

"_Nail_ polished?" Tenten asked sarcastically, emphasizing the word 'nail'.

"Quit yappin' and shut up!"

"Doesn't that mean the same thing?" Gaara spoke up.

"Oh yeah."

"Quiet now, people. And no, we are not gonna sing happy crappy songs. We are gathered here today to-" Shizune was cut off.

"Hey this sounds like a wedding! Stop being formal!" Naruto was annoyed.

"Whatever. As I said, we are here to decide our exchange-gifts partners. You must get a piece of paper from this box and pass it. You mustn't tell anyone, especially the person you picked, who you got." Shizune explained, handing a shoe box to the person on her left, which was Kiba.

"It smells like leather." Kiba said sniffing it.

"Just get on with it!" Ino complained. Everyone got one and the last one was for Kakashi. It's too troublesome for me to put here who got who, so I won't list it. It's not on my mind either.

"Sasuke, what do you want from Santa?" Naruto asked holding a piece of paper and a pencil. The senseis and Shizune and Tsunade magically transferred to the next room without the genins (and chuunin and dog) knowing.

"Isn't it obvious? He needs power." Shino said approaching him.

"It has to be something concrete. I'm gonna make a list of what you guys want and mail them to Santa." Naruto said.

"Whatever." Sasuke said and went to a corner to join Kankuro and Gaara watch an action movie.

"Fine then be that way." Naruto went to Neji and asked the same thing.

"Santa isn't real, idiot. Adults convince us to be good so that Santa would give us presents. But actually it's them who dress up as Santa to make it seem like they got two presents from two different people. They're like fairy tale characters and are make-believe." Neji said.

"I believe that pixies are real!" Lee screamed to support Naruto.

Tenten gasped. "Lee! I thought that was a secret!"

"It doesn't matter! I know that soon we'll all play spin the bottle and it'll stop on me and I'll pick 'truth' and they'll ask me what's my third deepest darkest secret and I'll have no choice but to answer that!" Everyone present who heard that had sweatdrops on their heads.

"You watch too much Fairly Oddparents!" Kiba complained.

"You know that?!" Lee asked, shocked.

"Of course I do! I like Cosmo!"

"I like the head pixie!"

"What's wrong in believing in Santa?" Sasuke asked Neji.

"I thought you were watching." Neji said.

"A stupid flash report appeared and disrupted the movie."

"What's wrong in believing in Santa is that when you believe in the dead, they'll rise and do horrible things to you like impersonate you and show up to the person/persons believing them."

"Too late. Santa showed up one night when I was three. He accidentally stepped on a star decoration and hopped, clutching his foot then knocking over the reindeer stand." Hinata said.

"I saw that too! That was my dad." Neji said. "Going back to my explanation, if you believe in the dead they could come back to life as zombies or psychos could cosplay them and scare people away."

"That explains it! During Halloween, I saw this guy dressed as Santa." Lee said.

Meanwhile...

"You can't force me to wear that!" Ebisu complained. oO

"I'll take you along with me during my next research." Jiraiya suggested.

"Who's it for anyway?" He asked knowing what he does on his research.

---Christmas Eve---

It was the middle of the night. Neji went to the kitchen to get himself a glass of water. From the corner of his eye, he saw something move in the darkness. He dropped his glass which caused it to break and attacked the intruder with his 'Jyuuken' straight into his abdomen. Since he was half asleep, he hit his arm instead.

"Oh for the love of Barbie and the Nutcracker!" The intruder yelped in pain as he dropped his bag and clutched his arm.

"Now let's see who you are." Neji turned on the light and showed Santa. He walked to him and pulled of his beard. "Oh it's you, Ebisu-sensei."

"What is going on here?" Hiashi's voice called out. He and his daughters woke up from the clashing sound the glass made when it fell.

"Ebisu-sensei? I don't believe it! Neji-niisan is right. Santa isn't real." Hanabi said sadly. "Do you have anything for me?"

"Yeah. Check the bag for a rectangular red box."

"You haven't answered my question: what is going on here?" Hiashi repeated.

"I came here to get myself something to drink. I saw him so I attacked him thinking it was a burglar." Neji explained.

"Who hired you to dress up as Santa? I know you aren't bold enough to enter our house. Speaking of which, how did you get here?" Hiashi asked.

"Numer one, Tsunade-sama told me while Jiraiya-sama was bribing me, Number two, through the bathroom."

"So that's why the senseis and Shizune-san and Tsunade-sama magically disappeared when we were in the Hokage's office." Hinata said.

"After all those years. I believed in Santa. I did good things I really didn't want to do just to receive something from him. He ain't real! No one can be trusted anymore!!" Hanabi screamed. "By the way, Merry Christmas everyone!" She screamed more than she greeted.

"Wow, she changes her mood really quick." Ebisu stated.

"Keep your voice down! You'll wake the neighbors!" Hiashi commanded.

A/n: I'm so sorry! The plot is terrible! But please forgive me! I worked hard on it!

Please Review! Comments, suggestions, complaints... As much as possible I don't want any flamers! I won't delete this story unless I want to!

Advance Merry Christmas!

Please Review!


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